Recently I ran into a marriage profile (created at some matrimony.com) of a relative of mine.The profile was created by his parents. It talked about the candidate more in terms of his BMI (Body Mass Index)- 5 feet 10 inches , 68kg weight , medium complexioned , 29 year old (working is implicit) from a reputed family (wonder if Indian constitution has any specification for reputed family), father gazetted officer ..Looking for a good looking girl , age 22-23, any qualification from a good to do family. Interestingly, in the same .com I ran into the profile of a classmate of mine whose profile, also created by his parents, looked exactly the same. (Wonder how a prospective bride would figure out the difference). Well, I spoke to few of my and figured out that they just don't have the freedom to choose the girl/boy they want to get married to because it is a family decision, which they have to merely adhere to.
Right from the time I can remember, everytime I select a dress to wear , I am asked to revisit my decision and wear something that would be apt from a social perspective. Recently , my husband and I went to my mother's home town where a few relatives nagged us both for our poor dressing sense. Everyone asked me if my husband has nothing better to wear than a track pant and if I didn't have anything better than an old kurta apart from the other things like where is all the jewelery?
There have been numerous occasions when I have not been able to express my religious beliefs . I'd rather call them my non-religious and agnostic beliefs. I can put forth thousands of messy incidents where I have been advised , admonished, emotionally blackmailed and subsequently cursed for not practicing rituals , not visiting places of religious importance or for even expressing in public that I don't particularly believe in adhering to a religion or that I don't believe in God. It is a choice that the Constitution allows me to decide and practice but often the community or society doesn't.
I agree that certain inquiries act as directions . However people hardly ever realize the importance of accepting people as adults who have independent thought process and decision making capabilities.Every individual has the right to express their identity whether it is in the way they dress or causes they wish to support.
